Six Quick Tips for Living with Ease
- Are you a leader? (0:40)
- What to do (sometimes) instead of interacting (2:00)
- What you can do instead of being the driving force (2:45)
- How to delegate effectively and what to do afterward (4:05)
- What to make number one on your list, every day (4:50)
- What not to make, ever (6:00)
- A free (yet priceless) gift you can give yourself and others (6:45)
- What will happen next (7:50)
Six Quick Tips for Living With Ease
It’s the beginning of the year, and we’re going to talk about how to take a load off; some tips for exhausted humans to help you be more effective, particularly in the places where you’re considered the leader.
Now, we all show up as the leader in a variety of places in our lives. It could be a formal title, it could be a role that you’ve taken on within family or friendships, or it could simply be being the leader of your own life.
But sometimes leading (and being human) can be just plain exhausting, particularly in the transition from one year to the next. So to lead with ease, I’m going to give you some simple, easy-to-understand and, perhaps, challenging-to-practice tips to help you have smooth and calm sailing.
I encourage you to use these techniques with family, with friends, with people who report to you, with your coworkers and clients. So, wherever I use the words staff, you can just replace it with family member, partner, friend, kids, or whatever works for you.
#1: Become the observer
Imagine that you are simply watching a play. Sit back and notice how people engage, how they interact – who takes the initiative? who follows? Let the interaction play out without your intervention.
While the path they choose may not be the one you would like to lead them on, the outcome might be delightful. So, give yourself a break and become the observer.
Give your staff space to struggle with problem-solving and any discomfort it may bring. This is also a great thing to do with the other people in your life.
When you show up as the one who has all the answers, it’s not only exhausting for you, but it becomes habit-forming for those around you. Pretty soon you will find yourself like Alexa, Amazon’s magic thing that sits in the middle of the room, and you can just yell things out: “Alexa, how many miles to San Luis Obispo? Alexa, what’s the temperature outside? Alexa, how do you spell academic?”
When you have all the answers, you become the Alexa for the people around you. But in the process, you take away their opportunity for discomfort and growth. So, allow the people in your life the opportunity and space to grow.
#3: Front-load effectively and then … let go
Practice spending more time on the specifics and the parameters when you delegate. Be sure that when you delegate, you cover the who, what, when, where, why, and how.
It’s also super-helpful to let people know what you imagine something will look like when it’s complete.
Then, allow the person to proceed with the project in their own way.
#4: Don’t drop the things that matter
As the tenor of the message of “Not Enough” creeps into the day-to-day, don’t let go of the foundational things that matter most – the number one item on your list should be consistent, reliable, and thorough communication.
It’s a good idea and a great practice to set up weekly check-ins with your staff. No matter how much people – including yourself – buck the time commitment it takes to actually check in, you will find that these planned check-ins, when you are fully present with people, are the glue that holds things steady through the new year.
#5: Don’t make assumptions
Emotions run high when we are under stress. We begin to take cognitive shortcuts, and one of those cognitive shortcuts is to make assumptions and jump to conclusions based on those assumptions rather than the facts. Assuming and its outcome can cause us to the get hot under the collar.
So ask clarifying questions and revisit the facts, then clean up any messes and move forward.
#6: Gift yourself with space
Allow time for a cleansing breath before, during, and after a tough meeting, a challenging family interaction, or a chore that you don’t want to do.
Reevaluate deadlines to determine if they’re truly essential.
Walk in fresh air instead of eating lunch at your desk.
Do whatever you can to shift energy and recharge your own system, and it will pay off greatly – not only for you but also for those around you.
Ready to create more ease and more space for yourself and others?
What will you notice?
When you begin to switch over to a place of ease, you will be amazed at how all the energy shifts in your environment. This is true if you’re the defined leader, either by title or ownership, or if you’re the unofficial leader, the one others tend to look to without even realizing it.
It’s your choice on how you choose to proceed and what energy you share with others.
So, are you dealing with drama and chaos in your workplace? If you are, contact me. Let’s get together and dig below the apparent symptoms to uncover the real concerns, and build a plan to increase the forward movement of your team or organization.
With Navigating Challenging Dialogue
- Explore triggers that get in the way of healthy dialogue.
- Develop tools to mitigate the impact of our own triggers.
- Learn strategies to reduce unhealthy conflict and drama. You'll increase staff job satisfaction and reduce turnover.
Starting in February 2018, I’m offering a Trainer Certification in facilitating my popular and effective workshop: Navigating Challenging Dialogue in the Workplace. To learn more, visit http://NavigatingChallengingDialogue.com and sign up to get more information about this great opportunity.