Peace Within Chaos

I am practicing finding places of peace within the storm of change and upset. It isn’t easy. But I believe it is essential.

The world will keep turning. Much is so far beyond my control. I can allow myself to become a victim of the churn so easily. But when I do, my head is not clear. My heart is anxious and angry. And my thoughts and actions don’t always align with my values.

I struggle with the balance of paying attention to world events and being in denial. And that tension alone is challenging. I feel guilt that I’m not doing enough. That I’m not making a difference. That I should be trying harder.

I’ve tried living all the ways over the past several years. Being in a heightened state of alert. Writing letters. Participating in phone banks. Calling elected officials. Sending postcards. Watching or listening to the news for hours. Scrolling. Waiting for the other shoe to drop.

And my physical body and emotional well-being paid the price. The chaos and uncertainty have gone on for a length of time that is unsustainable and unhealthy for most of us. For reasonable people.

I have recently leaned heavily on a model that I’ve taught to hundreds of people and somehow forgot myself, temporarily. The “Circle of Control”.

The model focuses on the following three simple things.

What I Can Control

This model reminds me that there are very concrete things that I actually have control over within chaos. I can spend time with my animals. I can walk in nature. I can eat healthy foods and get good sleep (most of the time). I can meditate, write, and draw. And, I can do work that I love.

Additionally, I can turn off the news. I can choose when I catch up or check in on what’s happening and from what source.

What I Can Influence

There are also things I can influence. I can write letters or send postcards. I can opt to connect with people I enjoy and can often avoid people who are upsetting to me (not always).

I can pray for peace. I can vote.

What I Have No Control Over

And then there are those things that I can’t control at all. The decisions of leadership. The impact big corporations have on the climate (although I can influence this by choosing how I spend my money).

I think the biggest thing that has helped me recently when I feel a lack of control is reading fiction. Becoming lost in well-told stories is a way to allow my mind to escape. And also drawing. Color is healing. Creating art helps me to focus on what I want to see and how I want my world to be.

I know not everyone has the same kind of choices and options as I do. But there are things that, if I spend too long thinking about them, will steal any peace that is available to me.

It may be a Pollyanna view given all that is swirling and afoot. And all of that feels out of our control. But I believe that the more peace I can create around me, the more peaceful the world will be. And perhaps that is my biggest singular contribution.

I’d love to hear your thoughts.

P.S. My work is shifting. I am focusing more on 1:1 coaching and consulting and less on training. If you need support, please reach out.