Transitions are uncomfortable. Transitions are also an opportunity to take a deep look at your life and decide what matters and what you want to come true or forward for the next phase of your journey.
This is what I’m going through right now.
I’m living on the East Coast after living in California for 23 years. I’m living in the southern US, which I never thought I’d do. I’m working part-time coaching and speaking. And I’ve recently discovered that, surprisingly, I’m a bit adrift.
I realized that I’m missing the daily structure I used to have. I used to have full days of training or preparation. On some days, I had coaching clients back-to-back. And when I didn’t have those appointments, I had so many projects and client preparation tasks that the day seemed to end before I made much progress on my to-do list. Then, in the evenings, I had events for the groups I volunteered with.
But now I wake up and at least 50% of my time, sometimes more, is unscheduled. It is free time when I can do whatever I want. And for me, that is hard!
I remember when I had Mrs. Finn for my 5th-grade teacher. She was strict (and seemed like she was 200 years old, though she was likely the age I am now). She was not the “fun” teacher. But I thrived in her class because every morning when school started, there was a check list on the chalk board of everything we had to accomplish by lunchtime. That list gave me structure for my day and was the impetus for my love of lists. Thank you, Mrs. Finn.
So now, I’m developing structure for my days again. But this time, it’s about getting closer to creating the life I want to live for this next part of my journey. My therapist had me do an activity where I wrote about what I want the next phase of my life to look like and feel like. Now, we are working on aligning my daily activities to support what I want as I move toward full-time retirement.
It feels like I “should” be able to do this on my own, but I’m finding that having an impartial person listen, provide feedback and hold me accountable really helps.
Andrea, my friend and coworker for the last ten years, suggested two online groups for artists that offer daily drawing prompts. She recommended starting my day creating art based on those prompts. This practice helps me move closer to my goal of becoming a money-earning artist.
I also know that exercise and movement are critical for my goal of living a long and active life. So now, after my art challenges are complete, I take the dogs for a walk in the woods. I love this time, and I actually look forward to it. (My therapist says we are going to add working out at a gym to my routines, but that remains to be seen.)
Another suggestion was to visit a local cafe a few times a week with my sketch pad to draw while having an iced tea. I went today, sans sketch pad, and met a woman who invited me to a bipartisan women’s group focused on democracy and voting for candidates who support democratic government. Just my cup of tea.
I’m beginning to feel a little more certain of the future and confident that my simple, honest goals are achievable.
I truly thought I’d have no problem transitioning to working less because I had so many things I wanted to do but never had time to do them. However, I’m learning that without structure, time slips through my hands, and I feel like I’ve accomplished nothing by the end of the day. I’m realizing that a big part of my motivation comes from structure. Interesting!
I’ll keep you posted on how it’s going.
In the meantime, if you are navigating a transition of your own and want help creating structure that feels comfortable and achievable, I’d love to support you. Get in touch to learn more about how we can work together.