A pattern I’ve been noticing is that some of my usually confident clients are reporting that their confidence is shaky these days. It’s no wonder. The pandemic has been a long-haul (darn, I’m sick of saying that). And it isn’t over yet. If you, like so many of my amazing clients, are feeling your confidence a bit shaken, try this.

A client came to our session with an inquiry about what he’s learning. The lesson he just completed focused on how involving employees in decision making can be empowering and lead to deeper engagement in the work. Had this manager continued with his thought process of empowering his staff to discuss deadlines that were already fixed, he’d be soon dealing with confusion, chaos, and even worse, a lack of trust.

When a culture of feedback exists, a team’s culture and morale will not be shaken by feedback. In fact, individual​s and the team as a whole, expect feedback. They view feedback as a tool to improve how they communicate and collaborate to make work more enjoyable, productive, innovative, and meaningful.

I'm seeing a new theme emerging in my coaching work. It aligns with what the media is referring to as the “Great Leaving” or “Great Resignation”. In fact, I just read that as of May 1, 2021, over 4 million Americans have quit their jobs. This is not great news for companies already scrambling to find qualified candidates. Let me tell you what I see in this shift.

Are you someone who people often bring their problems to? Do you find yourself spending a lot of time advising others on how to solve their problems? Do you find that with some of those people, no matter how many times you advise them or provide solutions, they show up again and again, stymied by the same challenge in a different situation?

The next time someone shows up seeking help, there is one thing you can ask that will propel them to gain deeper insight which leads to sustainable change.

Do you sometimes communicate something without being clear about what you want the other person to do with the information? And does that lack of clarity sometimes result in wasted time?

Here’s a question I get all the time now: “How can I keep my staff motivated and engaged when I’m exhausted myself? I can’t keep trying to fake it -- that’s even more exhausting. And if I talk about it, I’m afraid I’ll open a can of worms and it will turn into a whine-session.”

​When you are preparing to have a challenging dialogue, it is critical that you are crystal clear on what outcome you desire. Not just for yourself but for the other party as well. When you take the time to identify the reward or desired outcome for each party, you are able to express that at the onset. Expressing this in a clear, clean, and nonemotional way helps to keep the conversation focused and less personal.

Here’s the thing about building connections: it requires trust. And trust is developed through disclosure. Disclosure is your opportunity to model the behaviors you desire in others.

One of the least discussed aspects of leadership is what to do when you’re asked unanswerable questions. How can you answer with honesty and integrity while continuing to build trust and maintain employee or team engagement?

Successful managing-up relationships are nuanced and look different in every situation. There isn’t one specific formula or process that works. As I told my client, there is only one way to know if you’ve gone too far and that is based on feedback that you receive, both verbal and nonverbal.

So often we are hooked into the myth that in order to successfully manage people you must know all the answers. The truth is, you just need to be able to ask great curious questions.

When you communicate digitally does what you say match what you mean? Even though we think we’re crystal clear, the truth is we are frequently falling short. Overcoming these common challenges isn’t hard. I have a few simple steps that you can put into action immediately!

There is a pretty good chance that you and those you work with are experiencing some degree of languishing.

It is marked by behaviors like staying up too late binge watching tv or catching yourself playing games online midday, even though you know that these behaviors will impact your ability to hit your goals or the energy you need to deal with the pressures of work.

Depending on your industry, it is really tough to hire good employees right now. But are you letting your fear of losing a mediocre employee keep you from having direct conversations about performance?

This question comes up far too often in my coaching conversations. How would the performance of your business be transformed if you had a culture of feedback?

One client told me, “At the end of every one-to-one check in, I ask my staff what feedback they have for me and everyone always says that they don’t have any. They all say things are great. Yet when the employee surveys came back, a percentage of the team ranked me low in terms of leadership”.

This is not an uncommon issue that I hear from directors and managers, but I have four steps that will help you.

Are you hearing that your team doesn't feel appreciated? Even though you feel like you put effort into saying thank you, they are always hungry for more. Do employee engagement surveys indicate dissatisfaction? Even though there are all kinds of employee recognition programs in place. For acknowledgment to really stick, it must be grounded in a concrete experience or activity.

I was recently asked how a leader could get quiet team members to speak up more in meetings. The truth is, change doesn’t begin with the quiet team members, but with you.

The secret to encouraging engagement and participation rests with you and your skillfulness in 5 specific areas.

When you are ready to accelerate employee engagement and genuine accountability, there are three steps that you can integrate into your management style. Once you integrate and master these steps, you will be cultivating a workplace culture accountability.

Even in healthy conflict, if what you want to express is left unsaid because you’re not comfortable saying it, it simmers and eventually boils over. The outcome can be far worse than if it had been discussed immediately. And over time, those simmering, suppressed thoughts can be misdirected and come out sideways as sarcasm, blaming, shaming, gossip, manipulation, avoidance, or other unproductive communication behaviors. And this is what turns a potentially healthy conflict into an unhealthy conflict.