Here’s a situation many of my clients face:

“How can I deal with someone who hints instead of directly sharing information with me? I often feel blindsided when a project goes off track. And when I finally discover that things have gone wrong, one of my staff people says, ‘I tried to tell you last week.’ When I ask them when, what they share with me was not direct communication, but instead a hint I did not pick up on.”

The only solution here is to give direct, fact-based, clear feedback.  

When I am asked to help with positive culture building, I am often called in by leadership who wants to point fingers at their employees' behaviors and attitudes as what needs to change. Often, when it comes time for coaching, training, and consulting, the executives want me to focus on staff. They say that they are too busy. Or they agree to participate, but when the time comes, they are distracted, running in and out, or looking at their phone. All these behaviors convey messages to employees that are stronger and longer lasting than sentiments about teamwork and how much employees are valued. 

The swift river that is work and the emotions associated with work continues to flow while you are gone. In order to successfully jump in, you must be well nourished, well rested, and well organized. Otherwise you can end up flailing, being swept away and barely able to keep your head above water, just like my client.

One of the best ways to increase employee engagement is with 1:1 Check-ins. However, 1:1 Check-ins are one of the most dreaded and least thought about tools in the engagement toolbox. Let's talk about making check-ins more effective, efficient, and valuable.

When hearing empathy discussed, it is mostly in terms of meeting someone where they are at when they are experiencing distress. But I find positive empathy even more intriguing because of the benefits to both parties. Researchers suggest that people who practice positive empathy build stronger bonds with those around them and are more open to engaging and connecting in positive ways.

If you and those around you aren’t clear on where you’re going, how can you possibly get there? Follow my top tips to help you make your 2023 goal setting easier, and clear enough so you can take action. These strategies work for both individual goals and for organizational goals. 

When you are intentional about learning tools and strategies to become predictable, it’s a gift to those around you and yourself. There’s no more drama and chaos, and less shame and guilt, that unhealthy predictability can create. And you are showing those around you another pathway to deal with life and work pressures.

Management tools and worker engagement strategies that have been used in the past are just no longer effective. Yet most of my clients continue to try and deploy them. Change is hard, I get that. Still, change is critical. My forward-thinking client recognizes this for the crisis that it is.

The NCD mantras are the principles of Navigating Challenging Dialogue®. Each mantra is a simple saying that acts as a reminder to let the NCD Process guide you. The more you practice the mantras, the more they will be integrated into how you show up as a communicator who listens, is empathetic, and holds space for others to be fully seen and heard.

I was having a conversation recently with a leader of a large institution who was wondering what changes must be made to lead and develop people who are newly entering the workforce. Do younger generations who are potential or emerging leaders need more consistent and direct feedback than ever before? Or have we all always needed more consistent and direct feedback, but it wasn’t a part of what leadership considered important?

Even if you aren’t in a leadership position, you have a leadership presence. You get to choose what that leadership presence is. So why not choose a presence that instills confidence?

Leadership presence is your ability to command a room, communicate with charisma, and engage others to follow you. It is the brand that you are known for as a leader. It is what others say about you and think of you when you are not in the room. When you are someone who has authority or power over others, your presence extends far further than the physical space you occupy.

If you haven’t heard of Quiet Quitting by now, you will soon. I’m all for this! 100%. But I don’t love the term quiet. I believe this movement needs to be loud. Both employers and employees need to have difficult, messy, loud, healthy dialogue. Even healthy conflict perhaps. Because that’s how change happens.

​Chronic complainers are exhausting. They deplete the energy of everyone around them. The challenge is that they often don’t see themselves as complainers. But nevertheless, a chronic complainer must be dealt with before they bring down an entire team. Chronic complainers are not looking for advice or alternative suggestions. Anything you offer that contradicts their powerlessness, or recognition of their hardship, will be rejected.

Gossip is something we face everyday. It is alive in nearly every workplace, friendship, and family. How we deal with gossip is a key driver in creating the kind of culture we desire in these complex systems and relationships. If you are someone who wishes work culture was more positive and valuing, and you aren’t setting strong boundaries around gossip, you are part of the problem.

Gossip is an attempt to pacify or quiet a feeling of discomfort or vulnerability that rises up in me. My brain then adds all kinds of stories (fears, assumptions, judgments, expectations, values) to the data and makes the story bigger. Because what my brain is creating, I falsely believe sharing will bring me relief.

There is a movement of previously highly ambitious, committed workers who are making the choice to stop going above and beyond. They are no longer stretching the work day into the evening, weekends, and paid time off. You must help them know that they are seen and heard, even if you don’t agree or aren’t able to fix what they are wanting to be different. Here are my quick and easy steps to begin.

True and authentic communication is necessary. Without it, how do people come to truly know you? How does the reciprocity of trust develop in relationships? You must speak your truth. But how can you do that in a way that sets the stage for the best possible outcome? Simple. By turning the conversation around. Turning a conversation around involves these 4 elements.